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It was that they'd been encouraged to act like entrepreneurs and had gotten started when they were still young. So how do you help kids to develop resiliency? This advice is controversial, but it's effective. It's about responding supportively--while not solving all your kids' problems for them. But parents who want to give their kids a leg up and set them on the road to success will uproot their lives if necessary. Although the study focused specifically on girls, it didn't exclude the likelihood that such high-tempo reminders would have a similar positive effect for boys.

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Researchers at the University of Essex in the United Kingdom found that parents who set super-high expectations for their teenage daughters--and who constantly reminded them of those expectations--had daughters who were less likely to become pregnant, drop out of school, or wind up in lousy, low-wage jobs.

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Resilience, defined as "the capacity to recover quickly from difficulties; toughness," is an underpinning of success. A few simple examples:. We all want to lead happy, successful lives. But for parents, there's a time when your priorities shift a bit, and your most important goals start to involve setting your kids up for success and happiness in their own lives. A couple of years ago, Julie Lythcott-Haims, a former dean of freshmen at Stanford University and the author of the book, How to Raise an Adultsaid one of the best pieces of advice she had for parents was to make their kids do chores--and never do their homework for them! If you think, "Einstein was brilliant," that would reflect a fixed mindset; observing instead that Einstein figured out how to solve some very difficult problems would reflect a growth mindset. Don't praise for winning a race or a game; instead, offer praise for all the sweat she put in during practice--again, which led to the result.

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